Word Vomit*

"This is the start of something good, don't you agree? I haven't felt like this in so many moons, you know what I mean? We can build through this destruction."
-Gavin DeGraw


The desire for things and relationships that may or may not be in God's will = Dumb!

This entry is just a personal reminder...

I just want a guy that lives a simple life. One that makes time for me. I want a guy that doesn't pretend like I don't exist when I'm not around and doesn't turn into somebody else around other people. The world doesn't have to think he's gorgeous for me to think he is. He doesn't have to be amazing to amaze me.

I want a guy that doesn't think I am weird or crazy. Or maybe just a guy who thinks, if I am crazy, it's what makes me wonderful.

He doesn't have to be tough to make me feel safe. He doesn't have to say much to teach me so many things. I want a guy who is patient, forgiving, sympathetic, selfless, loving and affectionate, considerate, emotional, intelligent, dedicated, level headed and brave.

I want a guy that is honest.

He speaks with his heart. He treats me like he wants to be treated. I want a guy that keeps me in line and also supports me. I want a guy that gives me his hand because it's what he wants to do, not what I want him to do. I want a guy that is hurt when people or events hurt me, but is there to pick me up again all the same. To bring my mind back to the source of all strength worth possessing, back to Christ.

I want a guy that can just be silly with me...a guy that makes me laugh and enjoys doing it.

I want a guy that can write a letter like this and understands I can never be all these things, but also knows I am trusting Christ with every part of my life to shape it all and mold me into who He wants me to be, not who they want me to be. I want those two desires to be the same, Christ's and his. (This is my desire and understanding as well, for him)

The above all thing I want though, is to find an amazing person that will eventually grow to love me enough to make me the number two priority in his life. Number two behind the Lord. I want a deep meaningful relationship that snowballs into the second most wonderful relationship in my life, that is fed and feeds the other - my spiritual walk.

These are of course all secondary to what Christ wants for me and my life. If this isn't for me, then I don't need it. If I'm not supposed to have it for two years, five years, ten years, I don't need it until I am supposed to have it. And if I am never supposed to have it then I don't need it at all.

All I ask is that until then my wants are silenced, replaced with Christ's wants.


This post was borrowed from D.H, but edited by me...