"Un"

"Maybe...honesty need not be feared as an enemy or a friend." -The Fray

This week has been pretty difficult for me emotionally and I've had my rollercoaster moments.

I feel like life is passing me by as I'm stuck here watching it slip away. I've been stressed about school and how I'm not doing well or atleast I fear I won't do well. I know I don't live up to my potential, but I'm not sure why I don't change things when I recognize the problem? After being upset about a class, there was a moment the other night where a past character trait became very present within me. The big jealous monster attacked and fed the insecurities in me I forgot were there. This is not who I want to be...

I feel unwanted, unacceptable, and unintelligent around so many. I think I may love faster, harder and deeper than most people... it may be why I get hurt so easily.

Do you ever get so many thoughts running through you're head you don't know how to reach out and pick just one to analyze? I wonder constantly what God is doing with me; what He's doing with my feelings and what is going to come of them? I need to just sit back and acknowledge the fact that I'll never figure God and His timing/will out...maybe my brain and heart will get a breather when that happens...

More than anything, a change of scenery is needed.